What's it Feel Like to Lose a Friend?

Death. They say it's a natural part of life; the last part of life that we all face once in a while. What if we've never had anyone close die, such as a good friend of yours or a family member? I, myself, have never lost anyone and don't know how it feels or how it affects your life.

I fear I may finally experience the passing of a close friend, a girl whom I will call "Angel" because that's what I think of her as. That, and I want to protect her identity. Angel, a girl whom I've known for around two or three years now, is close to death from a common cause of cancer: lung cancer. According to what she told me over MSN, she has been diagnosed with small-cell lung carcinoma (SCLC) and has been chemotherapy treatments for as much as two months now. She is at Stage II Extensive SCLC and I fear the chemo is doing her no justice because, according to her, the doctors keep finding more tumors on her body. Metastasis is a huge bitch.

If I lose her, I don't know what I'd do. She is like a little sister to me and it'd be like both losing a sister and a best friend. It'll be hard on me to know that she's gone. She's had a really hard life and is looking for a way out. I want her pain to stop and reach everlasting bliss, and if that means her life has to end, then I guess no one can do anything about it.

I apologize if this either sounds kinda emo-ish or ill-written. It's just how I feel. And my writing skills are craptastic. Geek, out!